i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Acid is not a monday night drug
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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