If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
