at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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