there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
