I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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