I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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