My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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