how can u be prego again
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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