Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
