What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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