just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
