i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize