its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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