What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
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