I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
