Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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