i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
