yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
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