please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
What a fucking waste of an outfit
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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