like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
My breasts were aching with rage.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
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