I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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