Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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