but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Randomize
