I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
