Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
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