dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
