it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
