So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
