U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
