I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Randomize
