3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
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