Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
