Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
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