I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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