Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize