My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
