That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Randomize
