omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
