This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
