im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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