It's like a parade of train wrecks.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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