please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
