u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
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could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
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I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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