Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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