the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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