i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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