the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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