I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
