take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Randomize
