That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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